I Don't Walk On Water...

I'm producing and directing a series of one-act plays!! I am officially in pre-production in turning four of my short film screenplays into stageplays. I'm really excited and finally feel like I'm making steps to step back into my "career". I start casting actors soon. I haven't thought of a name for my play as I need something that will tie all of the stories together. I'll keep you posted.

I've been a little frustrated because I haven't been able to think of anything to blog about. Nothing too significant has taken place yet in the new year that I deemed worthy to talk about. I guess I've got my eye out for what will be my first disaster of the new year...lol.

So, I guess I'll talk about my current mood. I titled this blog "Taking Direction" because I think that if you're on a journey (or a to be in flight as I like to say), you have to have an idea of where you wanna go or even what you want to see. I see many things on the horizon. I am excited at my goals for this year. I'm excited because I've been able to seemingly put many things that used to bother me to the back of my mind.

This year I wanna take risks. What I mean is I'm going to start being more active and come out of my comfort zone. In the past I usually stick with my strong qualities and focus only on those. But, this year I want to expand my palette of skills and talents. And the way I plan to achieve is through hard work. One of the first things I have coming up is my first acting class which starts in four weeks.

Now, I've taught myself the art of directing. I studied and I've had on-the-job training. I love directing and working with actors and am extremely comfortable and confident in doing so. I've been doing it consistently since 2004.

But, now I'm venturing to the other side of the camera. I'm a little nervous. Not scared, but nervous. I mean, what if I suck? As a director, I pride myself on being able to reach and get great performances from the most mediocre of actors. I never used to have an interest in being an actor until about six months ago. But I am intrigued to attempt something that doesn't necessarily come natural. Honestly, I'm not worried about being a good actor, I worry about others' expectations of me as an actor. I've realized lately that my emotions have become more accessible to me. As a director, I know that that it is important for an actor to be able to tap into a given emotion at the drop of a hat. I feel that I can do that. The only thing I worry about is the memorization. LOL.

Another reason why acting has always intrigued me is the ways in which you get to show different parts of your personality by bringing life to fictional characters. It's a very intriguing concept to study to become a new person. And I'm game for new ways to express myself emotionally.

So, up until my first class, I just plan to stay in the gym and keep studying. I'm taking a few classes online before I head back to Tallahassee this summer to complete my last semester at FSU. Even when I go back there I will be leading a much calmer and peaceful existence even though I'm only planning to be there for the summer.

Right now since it's 5am, I'm wishing I could go to the gym and workout. I'm really thinking about joining this 24 hour gym that's right off the island. May be worth it.

That's all for now. Until next time...

I just finished working out. Today was cardio, so I did some running on the beach. One thing that I never do is work out without my iPod. I usually will make a playlist of songs each time I work out. I'm not like many people in that I need fast upbeat music to have a productive workout; working out is my time to think, to meditate, to wonder. My playlists help bring out those thoughts.

So, obviously today I'm thinking about the new year and what it will bring to my life. I really hate to be one of those people who are all about starting over or renewal just because it's a new year. But, I guess a new year's a good a reason as any. As long as the change is consistent and pure.

2009 will be the year that I finally finish undergrad and enter graduate school. I will be embarking on a number of new creative projects. I am also hoping to make huge professional strides now that I feel that I am ready and have more of a handle on what to expect from the film/television industry as a writer/director/producer/actor. This is also my year to stabalize my educational, financial and professional situations.

As of recently, I have made the permanent decision to remove meat from my diet. This is something I tried while filming my indie TV drama series project, MY BROTHER'S KEEPER, last summer. It was great. Now I know I've got the discipline for it.

I hope I make some great new friends this year. I got a message yesterday from a college friend of mine who is lobbying for me for an associate producer job for a TV show on a major network, so we'll see. I know that later this year I will be making the move to either New York City, Atlanta or Los Angeles, where I will settle for a few years.

This year I'm planning to kick up my interest in photography, embark on some new film projects, travel domestically and abroad and hone in on my interest in acting. I plan to sign with an agent by the summer and continue to write. I want to link up with some film friends of mine and collaborate on projects that we have been discussing for years, but can never find the time to come together to do them. I also plan to continue to make blogging a daily practice as I have fallen in love with this process.

This new year is all about being strong. That's my weakness. I need to work to be strong enough to leave the things and people behind who are detrimental to me. I need to learn to trust myself when I know that I deserve better. And to be okay with my decisions.

I am going to be a better brother, a better son, a better friend, a better boyfriend, a better man. To me. Like someone used to say to me when I was a kid: "Be good, for yourself."

The new year can't come fast enough for me. I am continuing my journey as a scorpion in flight. And this time, there will be no looking back.