I've been meaning to blog for the past few days and I'm finally taking the time today. So, the update on L.A. is...........I love it! At this point anyway. I've been meeting some great people and they've been showing me the ropes, taking me out and whatnot. I went clubbing at Circus the other night and that was a great experience. I went with some new friends and they showed me a great time. The people here are gorgeous, but, interestingly enough, alot of the friends I've been making are Hispanics, which is different for me, but cool nonetheless. When i lived in Vegas I had a lot of Hispanic and Filipino friends. My internship is still going strong, I'm loving it and learning so much. I still am nowhere near where I want to be job-wise, but I'm trying to stay optimistic that something's gonna come up. Until then, I'm taking advantage of my free time and still trying to grind and form new relationships and whatnot.

Um, I've been thinking how nice it is to be around people who don't have so many hangups about their sexuality. Back in Florida and around my prior group of friends, it seems I was always dealing with the elephant in the room 80% of the time with those people. But, it's not that it was Florida and the people in L.A. are so much better, but I think subconsciously back then I was drawn to certain types of people and you get what you pay for. So, I'm noticing that my frame of mind is very different now. I'm at peace usually. Sometimes I do experience a heavy case of anxiety about my job and financial situation, but for the most part I'm cool. Just trying to stay upbeat about everything. I was twittering yesterday about how my old friends are quickly becoming distant memories. And I like that. I'm finally becoming okay with letting go. Big improvement for me.

So, I'm just living my life, I'm cautious but open. Guarded, but willing. Nervous, but ready.

I wrote this recently, it's unfinished, but whatever:

Whenever I decide to miss you
I think about what I gave up to love you
My love was an unexplored weakness
You exercised no caution

Whenever I make up my mind to miss you
I remember the almost impossibility it takes each time to love you
I remember the pieces of you that don't quite fit
Into what I call the new me

Whenever my mouth fixes itself to call you
For a second my heart skips a beat
I think about what we left on our holy ground
I wonder who has taken to washing your feet

Whenever I see your face on the ocean
Your image ingrained in the waves
You watched as I built my sandcastles
You quietly watched without warning
You liked to watch without warning

And I stop myself from remembering memories
Whenever I decide to miss you.


we will be fine

live it up and enjoy the highs N' lows of your experience...

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